It was not a normal childhood for the 8 year old bastard child.
However , being born without testicles had become a roadblock for his childish and devious plan: To feed his Pappy rat poison and assume the throne!
It wasn't until his mid-twenties that he finally mustered enough courage to implement his murderous plot. His reluctance was overcome at breakfast one morning. After finishing off his second bucket of illegal KFC, he was refused a third.... and denied a refreshing American Pepsi-cola. He was pissed! And so, Kim Jong-un slowly began to spice up his daddy's kimchi with American D-con rat poison as he hockered and spat in Papa Jong-il's banchan. Pappy died face down in a bowl of egg soup.
Today...Jong-un set off his very own fireworks!! In the form of nuclear tipped missiles!!
But having no practice as a child, he did not know the dangers of lighting off fireworks so close to home! One of the faulty prisoner-made fireworks went awry, and landed in his own backyard...sending him and his pride-filled military cohorts to a Hellbound kingdom come....